This Epilogue (n. short conclusion) is actually a Prologue (n. introduction) to the following writing.. THIS Epilogue is written on Tuesday the 6th of September..
Having written the following two days ago..I have felt the need to clarify myself.. I am ON FIRE with energy and enthusiasm.. I have a clarity that usually takes me two or more months IN India to achieve.. I seldom (read never) do any writing OUTSIDE of India.. and here I am yet to get to India and I am off and running..
What I am writing about is intended NOT for all of you..NO.. what I am writing about is how I am managing to keep a current and on-going mental breakdown under some control and maintain a functional existence..
BY THE WAY DO NOT BE SHOCKED AT ME functioning while experiencing a mental breakdown (a clinically significant manic episode).. MANY World Leaders and MANY CEO’s are manic and functioning.. WE MANICS make the world revolve faster..
As I write along here.. there are others who UNDERSTAND THIS AND WHO ALSO STRUGGLE WITH THIS.. you are not visible to me and I will not even know some or most of you.. read For What It’s Worth .. 1.. you are under the bed or behind the door.. with your ‘bright eyes and eager ears’ watching and listening to see how I can hold this rocket sled on rails from going into orbit..
This sudden insight into my PERFECT STORM has given me a clarity which I have never yet possessed.. I am ripe for the PERFECT STORM and I have done nothing to deserve it EXCEPT TO BE HERE.. if you read about mental illness the MANIC DEPRESSIVE IS EXTREMELY SENSITIVE TO JET LAG..
In 1997 some of my closest allies begged me NOT to go back to India because of the crash I experienced returning from India in May of 1996.. a two year period with two psychiatrists in San Francisco and in Anchorage.. one of whom retired because I.. the patient.. was having so much fun that HE retired to begin enjoying his life and senior years..
OK.. the PERFECT STORM just for you ‘ bright eyes ‘..
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It is Sunday in Hong Kong.. September the 4th.. 2011..
What I am experiencing is the PERFECT STORM.. get this if you will..
First.. my body is manufacturing within itself substances that are providing me with tremendous energy.. I have now written and mailed out to YOU fifty (50) post cards and I have thirty (30) more I want to write and to mail before I fly to India this upcoming Wednesday the 7th of September..
Now holding this reality.. factor in the jet lag I am working with.. it is the perfect jet lag for the PERFECT STORM..
When it is day time here in Hong Kong .. it is day LIGHT outside.. and NO ONE really feels like sleeping during the day LIGHT time period.. especially when that person is experiencing a clinically significant manic episode.. so during the day time here I am up and out and about ‘doing’ things..
OK.. when the day LIGHT period here passes.. I now switch to the circadian rhythm of my body that is telling me the following.. IF we were home in the Eastern Time Zone of the United States WE (my body is telling me) would be getting up.. so it is TIME TO GET UP.. which I feel like doing because only a few days ago I WAS GETTING UP at that time in Hong Kong..
Keep in mind we have the perfect 12 hours jet lag cycle.. 8PM in Hong Kong is 8AM in the Eastern Time Zone.. so at 8AM I feel like getting up.. DESPITE THE FACT THAT I HAVE BEEN UP ALL NIGHT according to the Eastern Time Zone..
So I begin THAT ‘day’ period.. IF YOU FOLLOW THIS..
What happens eventually.. and I have lived out this scenario on all of my previous eight trips over ‘here’.. is that I literally crash and the FIRST CRASH has now happened.. yesterday at 8PM Hong Kong Time.. it was 8AM the same day in the Eastern Time Zone and I was going to make a telephone call at 10PM Hong Kong (or 10AM in the east).. despite this ‘plan’ I just CRASHED.. sitting on the bed I just went to sleep and SLEPT over four hours with NO C.P.A.P. and NO dental mouth guard for teeth grinding.. and NO preparation for going to sleep..
Which means I am beginning the process of converting to this time zone..
PROBLEM IS THIS.. on Wednesday I head to India and another time zone to adapt to.. EVENTUALLY this will all work itself out and I will re-balance my circadian rhythms..
I write this entire writing to soothe and assuage the worries of my closest friends and associates who worry about my balance.. I AM eating well and healthy.. so far NOT ONE OUTSIDE MEAL IN HONG AT ANY RESTURANT..
When I told this to Patti she was surprised.. “What .. no Singapore Rice Noodles in Hong Kong?” she fairly ‘gasped’.. here is the why.. a restaurant will be noisy and will be bright.. there will be a lot of people.. there will be tremedous activity.. SOMEONE very well may want to talk with me (I seem to attract people to me!).. all this does is to provide me with the SERIOUS RISK OF OVER STIMULATION WHEN I AM ALREADY OVERSTIMULATED.. so NO eating out.. period..
To further protect myself from over revving.. I am drinking a lot of water and juices.. AND I have been staying in the room when feeling over revved .. AND I HAVE BEEN GETTING SOME SIGNIFICANT sleep (I define this as four hours or more at a time).. writing to YOU the (now over) 75 post cards with more to come assists me to be calm in my room.. listening to MY music from MY computer on MY NEW BOSE NOISE CANCELLING HEAD PHONES also calms and quiets me down..
SO NOT TO WORRY.. I do know what I am doing and I MYSELF DO NOT WANT TO OVER-REV..
So over and out for now and I hope this post will ‘publish’.. we have been having some issues with the web site.. LOOK FOR YOUR POST CARD.. Smiles.. Cap..
- SEP 3, 11 .. HONG KONG .. TWO ADMIRERS
- INTO NEW DELHI .. SEP 07/11